You are viewing bramblekite

evilE!
Recent Entries 
16th-Apr-2014 10:56 pm - Today's Gift
2014
Today's thought from Hazelden is:

We do not have to get caught in the middle of other people's issues.
-- Melody Beattie

Learning to respect boundaries, our own and other people's, eliminates much of the stress that hinders relationships. Accepting the behavior and the opinions of our friends as legitimate for them allows our relationships to teach us tolerance and patience and love. Our journey on this planet is not about "fixing" or controlling others, but about loving them wholly, just as we want to be loved.

We need other people. Our humanity is enhanced by our mutual experiences. But we also need to let others learn from their mistakes and their own experiences, rather than to help them avoid what they need for their growth. We hate to see our friends in pain. Our compassion is triggered when trouble trips them. But their journey must be inviolate. We'll only prolong their struggle by intervening where we aren't needed.

It's hard to back away when a friend is in trouble. But telling a friend you love and support him or her may give them the strength they need.

You are reading from the book:

A Woman's Spirit by Karen Casey

A Woman's Spirit by Karen Casey. © 1994 by Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the permission of Hazelden.

10th-Mar-2014 06:55 pm - Today's Gift
2014
Today's thought from Hazelden is:

In this world everything changes except good deeds and bad deeds; these follow you as the shadows follow the body.
--Ruth Benedict


Our identity, our being at any moment, is a composite of all we have been in the past. Some of our actions have made us wiser. Others haunt us because we didn't put forth our best effort. All of our deeds contributed in some measure to our growth, however, and they can guide our choice to behave honorably today.

Acceptance, of who we are, our total self, is necessary for our emotional maturity. Shame for past actions will keep us stuck. Our restitution for the past is best made by responsible behavior today. How fortunate that each waking moment offers us opportunities to become our better selves.

Today, just like every day, I'll make choices to behave in ways that will fill me with pride or shame. I pray for thoughtfulness today.

You are reading from the book:

The Promise of a New Day by Karen Casey and Martha Vanceburg

The Promise of a New Day by Karen Casey & Martha Vanceburg. © 1983, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the permission of Hazelden.


 

17th-Feb-2014 08:40 pm - another good one
2014
Today's thought from Hazelden is:

How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it.
--Marcus Aurelius

Anger shatters our calm. Some of us show it in loud bursts; others just quietly stew. Sometimes we feel angry inside but we still want to look kind and unperturbed, so our anger comes out sideways, hurting someone indirectly or in sneaky ways. We all have felt the pangs of regret after we said or did something in anger. We wish we could magically turn back the clock and undo the moment, gather up the pieces, and put them back together again.

No one can simply banish the basic human emotion of anger from his life. To be responsible, we must accept our anger. It arises from within us and handling it is our own responsibility, even when we are perfectly justified in feeling angry. We choose our way to express it. It is never responsible to say, "You made me angry, so it's your fault that I blew up."

After accepting our anger we strive to develop a space between the feeling and our actions. We learn to notice our feelings before they reach the explosion point. In that mental space we choose how to express them.

Today I will notice and accept my anger, than choose respectful ways to express it.

You are reading from the book:

Wisdom to Know by Anonymous

Wisdom to Know © 2005 by Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the permission of Hazelden.

17th-Feb-2014 08:38 pm - Today's Gift: Family
Pippi Longstocking
Today's thought from Hazelden is:

Coping with Families

There are many paths to self-care with families. Some people choose to sever connections with family members for a period of time. Some people choose to stay connected with family members and learn different behaviors. Some disconnect for a time, and then return slowly on a different basis.

There is no one or perfect way to deal with members of our family in recovery. It is up to each of us to choose a path that suits us and our needs at each point in time.

The idea that is new to us in recovery is that we can choose. We can set the boundaries we need to set with family members. We can choose a path that works for us, without guilt and obligation or undue influence from any source, including recovery professionals. Our goal is to be able to take care of ourselves, love ourselves, and live healthy lives despite what family members do or don't do. We decide what boundaries or decisions are necessary to do this.

God, help me choose the path that is right for me with family. Help me understand there is no right or wrong in this process. Help me strive for forgiveness and learn to detach with love, whenever possible. I understand that this never implies that I have to forfeit self-care and health for the good of the system.

You are reading from the book:

The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

The Language of Letting Go © 1990 by Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the permission of Hazelden.

11th-Feb-2014 09:29 am - Today's Gift
2014
Today's thought from Hazelden is:

No person was ever honored for what he received. Honor has been the reward for what he gave.
--Calvin Coolidge

There's really only one way to achieve self-respect and that is to act respectably. We can't go back and undo our past. But we can act and behave respectably today, so that when we close our eyes tonight to go to sleep, we can say we have self-respect. A day at a time or an hour at a time, it's our actions now that count. If we put our self-respect on hold, saying something like "I'll have self-respect when I graduate," or "I'll have self-respect when I get a good job," we are putting off what we should do today. But when we live in the present, knowing it's all we have, we can give our best effort to life today.

Today let me treat myself and all those I encounter with respect.

You are reading from the book:

Our Best Days by Nancy Hull-Mast

Our Best Days by Nancy Hull-Mast. © 1990 by Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the permission of Hazelden.

2014
Today's thought from Hazelden is:

He that cannot forgive others breaks the bridge over which he must pass himself; for every man has need to be forgiven.
-- Thomas Fuller

Often we're afraid to forgive others who've hurt us because we believe that, in doing so, we are permitting what they've done. This is not true. When we forgive, we are saying, "I pardon you, I give up any claim for revenge, you are no longer an enemy."

Relationships are not all black and white. We can forgive people and still not want to spend time with them. Forgiveness is for ourselves. It is a housecleaning of the heart. It feels good to sweep out the resentments and bitterness, lift up the windows, and let in the forgiveness.

Today let me offer forgiveness, either silently or out loud, to someone who has hurt me.

You are reading from the book:

Our Best Days by Nancy Hull-Mast

Our Best Days by Nancy Hull-Mast. © 1990 by Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the permission of Hazelden.

4th-Feb-2014 06:44 pm - Good will
2014
Today's thought from Hazelden is:

Goodwill

Looking at other people with jealousy, envy, and mean and bitter thoughts isn't new to our world. The concept of giving other people the evil eye has been around for a long time. It's mentioned in almost every religion and culture in the world.

Sometimes we're not conscious of the darker thoughts we think. We might believe that ill will and the feelings connected with it - envy, jealousy, and resentment - are wrong. So when we feel that way, we push those feelings and thoughts aside.

"I remember lying in bed one night, tortured by my marriage, but believing it would violate my religious beliefs to get divorced," a woman said. "I started counting the years until I thought my husband might die. A light came on. I realized that wishing him dead was a lot worse than saying good-bye."

We want to believe there's a balancing force that prevails in the world. And while this force is balancing things out, we'd like to get some of the good stuff too. Hey, God, remember me?

Challenge:

The hardest thing about practicing goodwill is believing that when we're happy for other people - even when they're happier than we are - it will make us the happiest people in the world.

You are reading from the book:

52 Weeks of Conscious Contact by Melody Beattie

52 Weeks of Conscious Contact © 2003 by Melody Beattie. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the permission of Hazelden.

18th-Jan-2014 08:52 pm - Today's Gift
2014
Today's thought from Hazelden is:

Life is not always what one wants it to be, but to make the best of it as it is, is the only way of being happy.
--Jennie Jerome Churchill

We are generally so certain that we know what's best for ourselves. And we are just as often certain that what we think is best will guarantee happiness. Perhaps we should reflect on all the times in the past when our wishes didn't come true - fortunately.

Did any one of us expect to be doing today, what we each are doing? We may have expected children, a particular kind of home, a certain career, but did we really anticipate all that life has wrought? Addiction, and then recovery from it, was probably not in our pictures. But it does fit into the big picture. The happiness we experience today probably doesn't visit us in the way we anticipated a few years back. But it is measured out according to our needs. The choice to be happy with what is, is ours to make, every moment.

I can take life as it is, and trust that it is just right, just what it needs to be. The big picture guarantees me lasting happiness. Today's experiences will move me a step closer.

You are reading from the book:

Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey

Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey. © 1982, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the permission of Hazelden.

This page was loaded Apr 23rd 2014, 9:50 am GMT.